Friday, July 1
you piece of shityes that's my new name haha courtesy of serene oh. can you believe siti, serene and i spent 11plus am to 10pm together?? and except for the 1 1/2 hours that we were doing testwork, the entire time was spent talking. yes, talking. and about such random things. hahahahha oh shit i knew it'd be a good idea to go down for guides even though it's the exam period. how do i say this without sounding all soppy.. well to hell with sop, maybe i'll just say it anyway. you're my inspiration. =D all of you. plc 03/04, and all my friends from 4/6 etc. my mood's so much lighter than it's been for weeks. =D hee.
told them about my theory that black is the most beautiful colour. let me try to be coherent about this. it's striking, yet fades easily into the background. it both absorbs and radiates incredible amounts of heat. it's understatedly fashionable, which is an oxymoron in itself. and what strikes me the most - it's really just every single shade of colour in the world, mixed together. so really, while it appears dull and dreary.. it hides every beauty the world has. and i guess that sort of beauty's more appealing in its own way. you can get tired of in-your-face beauty. but inner beauty.. the kind that shines through most unexpectedly.. now that is worth looking out for.
i had a sudden urge to sing in the middle of math today. well i did 11 questions in 2 hours, and by the 12th i had this sudden impulse to burst into song.. and the impulse was so strong i had to bite my tongue so that i wouldn't open my mouth, croak and get tossed out for being disruptive during an exam. misread qn 13, spent about half an hour doing it wrongly and kinda gave up. counted all my marks [hey the paper's worth 100 marks! i counted!] and twiddled my thumbs until i realised i DID know how to do that question, but i was left with 15 mins. oh well.
been thinking a lot recently. heh like that's something new. i kind of admire jean for something. the ability to just space out. as in really, space out. when i space out or stone, my mind isn't empty. half the time i'm daydreaming out things that cannot be, and the other half i'm wondering about life's meaning etc.
remember when we were learning about the heart in sec3 and mrs wong made us do that pumping motion with our hands? and how it got tired after a few minutes, and she said we should really admire our hearts for being so strong? imagine if our hearts got tired, she said. well. i wonder why brains can feel tired, when they don't move at all.
my computer still refuses to play my songs. i want to strangle it. strangling is the most intimate way to kill. hahahahhahahahhaha. ever tried to strangle yourself? it's humanly impossible. just try it, you'll see what i mean. by the time you cut off your oxygen, you don't have the strength to squeeze your throat harder.
i realise how horribly masochistic that sounded. just to clarify, i'm not masochistic. nor sadistic. i guess i shouldn't try to explain any further.
oh well. la la la i survived the week -barely. God will make a way.
it must've been love.
10:17 pm
xoxo
